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Wednesday, November 24, 2010

He's lucky I love him!

Friday night I was so frustrated with my husband! I actually tweeted Shell to tell her that I wish she had PYHO everyday. In hind sight, it's probably best that this free therapy only happens once a week. That way I can sort through my thoughts before I post in a total man rage! This way you'll see I really do love him.

Long story short-hubs has a tendency to get a wild hair up his butt and decide it's okay to act like he has no responsibilities every now and then. This usually happens if he's reunited with any one of his loser friends (many of which actually don't have any responsibilities!). I think hubs is easily morphed back in time to the loser he once was, and reverts to this status within just a short hour of being around said real losers. For a short period of time he enjoys pretending he hasn't grown or matured in 15 years, and resorts to acting like the rest of these guys who really haven't. UGH!

Dear hubs,
You're pushing 40! We have two men to raise. So back to the real world, dude!
Grow up!
Your devoted wife

I'm over it now. It really wasn't that big of a deal. I know he's happy with the life we've made, but it's always been hard for him to separate old friends and recognize how they bring him down. I just get so irritated that he is so easily influenced when I know what a hard working, excellent father and husband he is. Why pretend to be anything else? Why even want to be anything else?

It's not really Friday that has me upset, it's what Friday night is a clear reminder of...the fact that we are so.completely.different.

(This reminder is sort in my face lately.)

In just about every sense of the word, we are different. How do two people so different from one another make it to their 50th anniversary? I say 50th anniversary because that's where we're headed! We have the clock working against us there, as we only got married in 2003, but I'm determined. No matter how aggravated I may be with him. I'm in it for the long haul. I still wake up in love every morning, and I can never stay mad for a whole 24 hours. Lucky him, right?!

As different as we are, we made a commitment to each other. We love each other, and we're both willing to put up the fight for our marriage. It's the work in between our present and our future that has me down.

I want to figure this marriage thing out. I want us to be old and grey and be the grandparents who stay married through the toughest of times. But how? (I don't really expect you to answer that.)

We both come from divorce, and we want to break that cycle for our children and our children's children.

**Fine Print: Please know that I am not and will never judge you for your choices(married or divorced). I believe in the institution of marriage according to God's word. I know eveyone's circumstances are different, and I will never try to pretend I know it all. This is my heart for my man and my marriage. He's stuck with me! I'm not puting in all this work for someone else to get the goods! Divorce is not and has never been an option for us. It's just that simple.

Breaking a cycle of divorce in your family line is hard. Almost everyone in my family (except for one sibling) has been married and divorced multiple times. It just seems like the world lies and tells us this is an option when things get hard. There are times when I feel like the differences between hubs and I are too great. Times I feel defeated. Times I just want to throw in the towel. That's how I felt Friday night. What's the use of all of this effort? We're just too different. My mad brain begins to listen to lies that it would just be easier to quit. I know this is a lie my enemy wants me to believe!

"The enemy comes to steal, kill, and destroy."
~John 10:10

So Friday night, I went to bed. I woke up the next morning and realized (like I have many times) I can't live without him. And even if I do say so myself, he cannot live without me either. It's true, ask him.

We have to learn to figure this thing out. It's not always smiles and giggles here. Sometimes we argue. Sometimes the kids hear. But, they always see us make up.

Other times...
They see us laugh together. Sometimes they see us sit and hold each other. Sometimes they play with us, sometimes we wrestle and laugh until we pee our pants, sometimes they watch a movie with us, or snuggle up in bed with us. Sometimes when we kiss my five year old yells, "Stop making out, Mom!", and we all laugh.

Those times make the hard times worth it. God has a plan for my marriage, and I know it will be to His glory when we're old and grey and still laughing with each other. This is the TRUTH!

"For I know the plans I have for you", declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future." ~Jeremiah 29:11 

My marriage needs some work, but I know there is nothing too great for my God!

Jeremiah 29:11 is a favorite of mine, but if you keep reading God says in verses 12-14, "Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you", declares the Lord.

We can't stop at just knowing God's plan is good. We have to know how to obtain it, find it. I think verses 12-14 tell us how. I will seek God's plan and favor for my marriage. No matter what-whatever it takes.

I want more than I could ever ask or imagine!
(Ephesians 3:20)



At November 24, 2010 at 8:43 AM , Blogger Shell said...

Are we married to the same man? B/c that is how mine gets when he is around his friends. And we are sooooo different. I get frustrated sometimes. And I know he does too. Both of us have parents who are divorced- his mom several times. But, like you, we want to make this work.

At November 24, 2010 at 8:46 AM , Blogger Di said...

Oh Adrienne - I think we live parallel lives. My hubby gets so stupid sometimes it makes me want to kill him - and leave at that moment. But the rest of the time I couldn't imagine not being with him. Maybe its just a guy thing?

At November 24, 2010 at 10:58 AM , Blogger Jessica said...

My husband is the calm, mature one in our marriage... he still ticks me off sometimes though. But we both have equal amounts of learning to do when it comes to having and sustaining a rich marriage.

What a fun and worthwhile ride it is!

At November 24, 2010 at 12:03 PM , Blogger Go Mommy said...

Ha, my goodness, I can so relate to this post. Sometimes I want to bang my head against the wall or just run away! I love my husband and I could never imagine my life without him.
I think it is good that your kiddos have seen you at time not happy with each other and then make up, kids need to see that life isn't always easy but it is the way you work through things that is important. My son see's it from us sometimes and when he gets upset he always says "we need to talk", he sounds like a little man!

At November 24, 2010 at 4:54 PM , Blogger Jill said...

Hi, I'm a little behind but visiting and now following from the Hip Homeschool Hop. So glad I found you ~ love your blog and look forward to exploring it more!
Blessings to you,
Jill @ Sweet Diva

At November 25, 2010 at 7:58 PM , Blogger Mama Hen said...

Adrienne, I think that everyone goes through this type of thing now and again. Two people coming together are bound to have differences. The fact that you and your husband both want to make sure you work through things so you will not divorce is important, as well as the love you have for one another. I hope you have a great Thanksgiving! Have a good night!

Mama Hen

At November 28, 2010 at 12:19 PM , Blogger Ruth said...

Dearest Adrienne, hope things are well and you had a beautiful thanksgiving.

Have a blessed week ahead...

At November 28, 2010 at 3:36 PM , Blogger Erin said...

I think we can all relate to this on some level...marriage takes WORK. It isn't all sunshine and roses. My hubs irritates the crap out of me sometimes (and I'm sure he'd tell you I do the same to him, lol). I know we have to be more patient with each other and keep the communication between us open and honest. But I feel ya.

At November 28, 2010 at 7:11 PM , Blogger Tylaine said...

Wow what an excellent post. I can't tell you how much I relate to that post. As much as I hate sometimes being in this situation (for a time) it's comforting to know there's other women out there with the same problems and concerns.


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