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Wednesday, July 13, 2011

It's a good day!

We finally had the therapy appointment we've been waiting for today. It went really well! The therapist seems very nice, and has suffered from OCD himself. I'm all about someone who has experience with the topic at hand! Today was the basic interview/first appointment kind of meeting, but I have a good feeling about this guy, and feel confident that he will be a positive influence for my son. Thank God!

My son was very receptive during our appointments today, and I'm super proud of him. After we met our new therapist, we also had to meet with our psychiatrist to make sure we get a prescription for a follow up, and although she is very intimidating for him, he did well at that appointment too.

I'm feeling at peace today knowing I'm on the right track. I feel like I'm in the driver's seat this time. Not that I'm being a control freak, but if I rely on doctors to tell me everything, I'll never figure out anything!

A few years ago I felt helpless, and uncertain about the direction I should take with my son's care. I put too much value on what others told me was going on with him, instead of following my gut! I'm not going to let that happen to him again.

I'm his mom AND his teacher! Nobody knows him better than me!

We had an interesting conversation with his psychiatrist today. After hearing an update on the progress we've made in the past few weeks, she started telling me we need to tackle his ADHD next. Um, hold on, lady. First of all, she only knows he was misdiagnosed with ADHD a couple of years ago because I told her in our last appointment. My son has been nearly silent in both of our sessions, and I'm wondering why she would even choose to zero in on this? Did she hear anything else I shared with her last time? He's been attentive and nervous, and hasn't even had a chance to get to know her. Ugh! Here we go...

I immediately explain to her that while I am not opposed to ADHD, and do believe that my son displays many of those traits, I do not believe this is the root to his problems, and we know medication for that did not help him in the past. I remind her that our psychologist has recently diagnosed (and I agree) my son with mild Asperger's Syndrome and Sensory Processing Disorder. I leave out my opinion, which is that this is the only thing that has made sense in 12 years, and I know in my heart we're on the right track.

She smiles, shakes her head, and tells me she doesn't "do" Asperger's. She proceeds to tell me she's from the "old school".


That's when I sit back, take a breathe, and tell her...

Look. I understand your medical opinion, and I'm sure it's based on plenty of psychiatric experience. Call it whatever you want! I honestly do not care what label you write on your form, as long as you help him. I just want my son to grow up confident, comfortable, and happy! I want to empower him to manage the things he struggles with, and learn to tackle all of this. Period!

That's when she shuts up and says she wants the same thing. I smile, and confidently tell her that I'm glad we have established we are on the same page, and as long as I feel my son is benefiting from her prescription care, we will continue to see her.

Here's the thing. My son isn't going to receive any useful therapy from her. She's a doctor. She writes the script. I'm OK with that. I can see the anti-depressant she prescribed is helping him, and she has served her purpose.

I'm learning to create a team of the people he needs. It's not going to be one thing or person, and it's not going to be overnight. It's going to take time. We met a therapist we like. We have a more than supportive psychologist. In God's time we will find the right OT, and I will use this psychiatrist for what we need her for. All of the puzzle pieces will start to fall into place.

I understand there's debate about Asperger's. My son is very high functioning. His quirks are not in-your-face until you spend time with him. She's spent a total of 1 hour and 30 minutes with him. Not everyone in the medical community (especially those from the "old school") will always tell me what I want to hear. So what. I don't need them to anymore. I know what my heart is telling me, I'm finally following my instincts instead of worrying about what others think, and ya know what? We're getting somewhere. That's what matters!

I felt good when we left. I felt confident I made the right choices today. There's a lot to be said about that. I give God all the glory for helping me today. I asked him for his help, and he delivered!

Since it's still Wednesday, and I still have time to visit some of you. I'm linking this post up with Shell at Things I Can't Say. I did pour my heart out after all.

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At July 13, 2011 at 8:56 PM , Blogger Rebecca Watson said...

glad everything is starting to move in the right direction for you. It's nice to have the feeling of being in the drivers seat. Keep up posted with updates!

At July 13, 2011 at 9:11 PM , Blogger blueviolet said...

I'm really happy that you've begun a path to make things better! Wonderful!!!!

At July 13, 2011 at 9:18 PM , Blogger Janet Rose said...

Peace comes at a high price sometimes, but it has to be a great feeling for you all to finally experience again. So wonderful to hear that your son went through his appointments with success.

At July 13, 2011 at 9:27 PM , Blogger Shell said...

Oh, I would be so frustrated to hear someone tell me they are old school and don't want to go with the diagnosis that I felt was right.

Sounds like you are making a lot of progress!

At July 13, 2011 at 9:43 PM , Blogger Karen Mortensen said...

I am so glad things are going better. Keep going. I am so proud of you and your son.

At July 13, 2011 at 10:42 PM , Blogger DysFUNctional Mom said...

Glad you had such a good day! I totally get where you're coming from, we've been down that road with my stepson (who lives with us). I am still not 100% confident that he has been correctly diagnosed, but we're making some progress so we'll keep plugging on.

At July 13, 2011 at 11:32 PM , Blogger Sarah said...

I'm so glad that things are going well!!! As for the psychiatrist, there are a lot of "old schoolers" in that profession and they need to get with the times. That annoys me so much when any member of the medical profession says that. HELLO!!! This is a profession that changes on a daily basis..geez!!! Anyway, I am glad that things are starting to move in the right direction!!! Your son has a great mom and teacher and you should be proud!!!

At July 14, 2011 at 8:41 AM , Blogger Karen Greenberg said...

I am happy to hear that you are following your instinct and doing what you feel is best for your son. After my recent go-round with the medical community, I know how very important that is. I'm glad you are telling the doctor how you feel and what you need. I love your attitude!

Thanks for stopping by my blog earlier and leaving a comment. I'm looking forward to reading more of your blog!

At July 14, 2011 at 1:21 PM , Blogger Adrienne said...

I think as parents with our children we just want to be in control and know we are doing what is best for them ..I hope this is a good path and the Therapist helps a bunch to make it better for you son

At July 14, 2011 at 1:23 PM , Blogger The Woven Moments said...

Hoooooooray for progress! This just makes my day. :)

At July 14, 2011 at 1:48 PM , Blogger Jenny said...

So glad that you had great appointments, that actually got somewhere. I am with you have to be proactive when it comes to your child's care...a mom knows when something isn't right.

At July 15, 2011 at 8:55 AM , Blogger Evonne said...

I'm glad everything went well with the appointments. I think sometimes doctors think they know it all, but they don't know our kids like we do.

At July 15, 2011 at 12:36 PM , Blogger Boobies said...

So the old school doesn't treat legit disorders? Ridiculous!

In any event..I'm SO SO SO glad you finally have some control again and your lil man is getting all the help he can.


At March 28, 2012 at 8:04 PM , OpenID jesterqueen said...

Oh my GOD. If we didn't have an awesome psychiatrist helping us through the maze that is our son's SPD/Asperger's/behavior whatevered brain, I'd lose my mind. I'd like to sock that lady for her 'old school'.

The psychiatrist has also been helping the Asperggian daughter, lately.

And I absolutely agree. It takes a huge team.


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