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Thursday, January 12, 2012

Shut up! and Be a Better Friend.

I'm a talker. I'm less of a talker than I used to be. Maybe that's because I talk to all of you now? But, I still have my IRL soapbox moments.

My worst quality? I'm a terrible listener.

I don't mean to be selfish or inconsiderate. I really don't.

There are days when I have all these thoughts running through my head, and their screaming to get out. It's all I can do to keep myself contained until I can share them with someone. Out loud. 
What? Oh, I'm sorry were you saying something?

And, I'm also pretty positive that I have adult ADD.
Oh, you weren't done. Sorry.  

So yeah, like I was saying. About me...I have a bad habit of being a terrible listener. The more I try to focus, the less I hear. The more I start thinking about how I should respond. Because it is all about me, right? 
I'm sorry, what? I was just noticing that person walking by. Did you see that jacket? Weird. Anyway. What were you saying? No, really. Go ahead. I'm listening. 

No, I'm not. I'm thinking about what I will say after you say what you're saying. If you don't speak fast enough I will try to compete your sentences for you. Annoying? I know. I'm sorry. 

Mama Kat got me thinkin'...
I have a  friend. She's wise, faithful, loving, and kind. She's supportive, and she's the best listener I've ever met. EVER. She listens without judgement and only shares her opinion if you beg her to. She's not mousy by any means. She simply has a heart open to try and understand others. She has her opinions. And believe me,  she'll share 'em when the time is right. But, she's poised with a quiet spirit I admire and love, and she is without a doubt an introvert.

So I naturally thought of her when I read prompt #5

My friend is pretty awesome. I respect her as a mother and christian woman. She's raised 4 lovely children who are the sweetest kids ever. She's real and I just love her! 

I've watched her observe others and it's fascinating. Watching her I realize how much I miss by running my mouth all the time. If I would just sit back and listen every now and then I just might hear something interesting. You can learn a lot by being quiet. I've tried it. It's pretty fun.
Almost as fun as running my mouth. 

So, I got to thinking about what my friend has taught me about friendship... 1. Shut up sometimes. Your friends have stories too. 2. Every self-centered, talkative, ADD girl should have a quiet, introvert friend who won't judge her for being a bad listener.

So shut up! And be a better friend. :)

Inspired by Prompt #5: A lesson I've leaned about friendship from an introvert. 


At January 12, 2012 at 9:17 AM , Blogger vinobaby said...

Ha! We all need to follow that advise some more. I am rather shy IRL, but still find myself cutting my friends off on a regular basis.

At January 12, 2012 at 9:43 AM , Blogger Tiffany said...

Are you sure we're not sisters? Because when you described yourself, that is oh so totally me!
I need to stop and shut up too. Now you have me wondering if I have a quiet friend who listens to me?

At January 12, 2012 at 9:49 AM , Blogger Lisa said...

I need to shut up more with my husband. My friends I am good with. :)

At January 12, 2012 at 11:15 AM , Blogger Jeanie Cullip said...

Yes a simple lesson I need to learn as well. In fact the reason I started blogging when I became a sahm I had so many things to say to my husband when I got home ... now I can share my thoughts in bloggy world and keep the words to a minimum in the evening giving my Coffeemate a chance to say the few words that he needs to share :)

a latte of blessings & giggles,

At January 12, 2012 at 11:36 AM , Blogger MiMi said...

I'm a pretty good listener, but sometimes I find myself doing the "guy" thing. Trying to give advice on how to FIX things. And lots of people don't want to hear that, they just want listening.

At January 12, 2012 at 6:20 PM , Anonymous Galit Breen said...

Love the advice! :)

At January 13, 2012 at 12:56 AM , Blogger Michelle said...

Sometimes when I sit down to blog, all I can hear is Toby Keith singing "I Wanna Talk About Me"....but since I think I'm interesting, I figure it's okay to pour all that talking about me into my writing and then I can listen to my friends (hopefully they're talking about my latest post)!

At January 13, 2012 at 7:17 AM , Blogger Julie said...

I think everyone needs to listen to that advice now and then about shutting up. Because sometimes its worth it!

At January 14, 2012 at 7:17 PM , Blogger Patrice said...

As a listener myself, I love having a talker around...

At January 15, 2012 at 6:49 AM , Blogger Rachel Cotterill said...

For an extravert (which I certainly am, according to every test I've ever taken) I'm pretty quiet. I love to listen to other people's stories - after all, I already know all the stuff that's happened to me, so I don't get so much out of telling people about it :)

At January 15, 2012 at 10:16 PM , Blogger Self Sagacity said...

That is a treasure! Wonderful gift to have.


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